Jerry Seinfeld / David Bowie
October 2, 1999

I grade these on a point system. Each section got a one out of 5 rating,
and the final score determined the grade.

I was rather disappointed by SNL's 25th season opener, particularly since
the great one, Jerry Seinfeld, was hosting it. One would figure his spot
would be wall to wall hilarity. Yet he seemed grossly out of place among
lame jokes, most of which were "laughable" at best. This episode reminded
me of the grim 94-95 season. Let's hope they're not up to repeat that.

INTRO: Ross Perot and the Reform Party.
Rating: 2/5
I really hope Cheri Oteri as Perot was a fluke mistake and it will never
happen again. This sketch really only took off when Will Ferrel barged in
as Jesse Ventura and hurled an obvious dummy around (a mainstay of SNL).

MONOLOGUE: Jerry Seinfeld
Rating: 1/5
This was the most disappointing moment of the show. We all expected Jerry
to go on his famous "ever notice" routine that he did the last time he
hosted. Instead he only yakked about television, getting minimal laughs
from the audience. Zero from me.

COMMERCIAL: www.clownpenis.fart
Rating: 5/5
Very funny. I like SNL's way of leading you on only to reveal something
totally out of place in the commercial.

SKETCH: Morning Latte
Rating 3/5
This used to be funny. This time it just seemed labored. And they dropped
the famous "You Stupid Bitch!" line from the sketch, which made it all the
more worse.

SKETCH: Mary Cathrine Gallagher wants a Jewish Boy
Rating: 2/5
One of SNL's flaws is that they don't know when to put a character down.
Mary Cathrine Gallagher is becoming extremely tiring, her 'fingers under
her arms' joke older than Jesus (as I could tell by the audiences minimal
reaction this time.) I will give them some credit for the line "Catholic
poozle" though.

COMMERCIAL: Javis Home Security System
Rating 4/5
Again, the technique of leading us on works very well.

SKETCH: Action News
Rating: 2/5
A funny concept, because that's pretty much how News is these days. But it
dragged out into a 3 minute sketch that died on impact.

Rating: 4/5
At least Colin Quinn mantains his integrity. But the bright spot of this
was Jimmy Fallon's impression of Seinfeld, while arguing with Seinfeld. A
classic moment.

Rating: 1/5
Can they try and get someone who's had a hit since 1990?

CARTOON by Robert Smigel
Rating: 0/5
Yeah, I know what you're saying. How can I rate a cartoon that didn't
appear? Well, that's why I rated it. Possibly the funniest moment on SNL,
the cartoon, and they drop it in the season premier. I don't know who was
dropping acid when this decision was made, but I really hope it returns.

SKETCH: Jerry Seinfeld in OZ
Rating: 4/5
A neat concept that played out pretty well. "Make up sodomy" and "A contest
to see how long they can go without performing male rape" was hilarious.

SKETCH: 1-800-EAT-SH**
Rating: 2/5
Another funny concept, someone actually calling that number, but it played
out too long and rapidly deteriorated. By this point I pretty much knew my
rating of the show.

SKETCH: ...and a Pizza Place
Rating: 2/5
This episode seemed to have been suffering grossly from "Good concepts
played out too long" syndrome this evening.

Rating: 3/5
This song was kinda cool...I guess.

Rating: 5/5
The best moment of the whole show, and I'm kinda glad they saved it towards
the end. Horatio Sanz and Jimmy Fallon were hilariously funny while they
pounded on Jerry Seinfeld. Will Ferrel smacking him with a clipboard and a
bedpan, and Jerry almost cracking up during the sketch made for one of the
best sketches I've seen in a long time. Too bad the rest of the show
couldn't have been like this.

So, they recieve a total of 40, out of 15 sketches, that makes for a 40 out
of 75.

Let's hope this isn't a harbinger of things to come.

Episode Review written by Cas Fornalski

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