Elijah Wood / Jet
December 13, 2003

By Eric G.

I was in the audience for the dress rehearsal. I'll go through the dress rehearsal order of the show.

Hardball: I was glad to see this open the show after it got cut the week before. Amy's Hillary impression was pretty good. She looks more like her than Ana did.
Grade: A+

Monologue: So far all 4 episodes I was in the audience for this year, a former cast member made a surprise appearance. Chris was great in this. In the dress version though, when Gollum was promoting the sitcom, he stood up waving a cigar around in his hand. I don't know why that would have been cut.
Grade: A+

Wake Up Wakefield: Also glad to see this after it got cut the week before. The Clay Aiken stuff with Megan was funny.
Grade: A+

Celebrity Poker(cut): This sketch was absolutely hilarious! Tina played Meghan Mullaley, Seth was Carrot Top, Elijah was Jack Osbourne, Amy was Sharon Osbourne, and Jeff was Gary Busey who was under the misunderstanding that they were playing strip poker. This should have been in the show. Tina fans would have flipped over her playing Meghan, and Seth doubters would have seen him be hilarious in this.
Grade: A+

Choir: This was one of those sketches that Jimmy laughed his way through in the dress rehearsal, but he actually managed to keep it together for the live show. Elijah didn't quite hit that last high note as well as he did in the dress rehearsal. It was a decent sketch though.
Grade: A

Gore And Dean: This was allright, but there was another sketch involving them later in the show that I thought was better. 
Grade: B+

Queer Eye For The Straight Guy: Jimmy was great as Carson Kressley. Seth's characters's part with telling Santa to get rid of the beard was pretty good. The kid topped it all off with the Kathy Bates line.
Grade: A+

TV Funhouse: One of the better ones, but I think it's a shame that a cartoon makes it on over a live sketch. 
Grade: A+

Weekend Update: The dress rehearsal version of Update was really uneven. Tina and Jimmy had quite a few jokes bomb. Tina screwed up reading a couple jokes, and Jimmy was already telling the audience which jokes of his he was going to cut for the live show. I didn't think the John Mayer bit was good. Maya, Kenan, and Finesse saved Update as Whitney, Bobby, and Bobbi Christina.
Grade: A(live version) B(dress version)

Versace Egg Nog: This sketch went on right in front of me. I loved the way Donatella came down the chimney, and when she was screaming at Boy George. 
Grade: A+

Scrooge(cut): This sketch was absolutely brilliant. Seth played Scrooge, and it was a twist on the story. In it, Tiny Tim's family had really been rich and was stealing from Scrooge, and they try to cover it up when Scrooge pays a surprise visit. If this had made the live show, it would have been one of those classic sketches that would have been repeated for years on the annual "Best Of SNL Christmas Past" specials. I hope they give this sketch another try next year, or at least put it in the next Christmas special. 
Grade: A+

Microphone Technician(cut): This sketch centered around Fred playing some nerdy guy that couldn't fix microphone problems for some kind of benefit concert. It was the only so/so sketch of the night.
Grade: C+

Bumb Blonde(cut): Elijah played a guy bringing his dumb fiancee home to meet his family, and the family goes berserk. Rachel played this same character in the Alec Baldwin dress rehearsal, but both times it has been cut. 
Grade: A+

Gore and Dean #2(cut): This was a pre-recorded bit where Al is going around NYC telling people he is endorsing Dean, but no one pays attention to him, not even Tipper when they are in bed at night.
Grade: A+

O' Reilly Factor(cut): This had Jeff as Bill O' Reilly with the debate on his show being whether or not Santa exists. Amy was on Ann Coulter, and they had a little kid in the sketch that Bill was yelling at. The kid messed up a bit and started to say one line too early. It was a decent sketch though.
Grade: A+

New Hannukah Commercial(cut): Chris played a spokesperson for a new wild and crazy 8 nights.
Grade: B

Buddy Mills: This was pretty good, but I really don't need to see any more of these. Elijah was funny as the young comic.
Grade: A

Overall: This was without a doubt, the best dress rehearsal I've seen, and I think it would up being the best live show of this season. There was so much more extra material than usual that they could have aired part 2 to this episode the next week.
Grade: A