Halle Berry / Britney Spears
October 18, 2003

By JdW

Cold Opening
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"The Bryant's Prepare for Court"(9/10)
PLAYERS: Finesse Mitchel, Maya Rudolph & Chris Parnell
*Great cold open, solid start to the show tonight! Maya excelled here this was hilarious! Laugh laugh and yes...laugh again!

Monologue
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"Halle Berry"(10/10)
PLAYERS: Halle Berry, Lourne Micheals(!!), Jimmy Fallon, TINA FEY, & Britney Spears
*Best monologue of the season so far, and it's good to see Tina out from the Update desk again! Tina and I are married... but Jeff Richmond and her don't know it. Anyway this was a great monologue, it had Lourne and a kiss between Halle and Britney that was not meant to be! I loved how they shoved Tina aside and how Lourne and Jimmy tried to get them kissing. HIGH-larious

Commercial
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"Gaystrogen"(8/10)
PLAYERS: Fred Armisen, Chris Parnell & Finesse Mitchel
*Was this Fred's first commercial? Wait, I think he was in "Clappin'" last year! Anyway, this is turning into the night of the featured players! All three of them had multiple sketches and huge airtime! This was a great commercial! A pill that keeps you gay! NICE!

Sketch
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"Don Zimmer's Sports Spectacular"(3/10)
PLAYERS: Horatio Sanz, Will Forte, Jeff Richards, Darrel Hammond & Halle Berry
*and... BUZZKILL. Even New Yorkers need to admit this was way too long and did not belong as the first sketch! It gets a three for Darrel's Costas impression, but although it hurts me to say it, this sucked.

Sketch
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"Versace Halloween"(8.5/10)
PLAYERS: Maya Rudolph, Horatio Sanz & Halle Berry
*Ah, soothing redemption after the last bomb. This was so funny, I love the Versace sketches. maya has a great impression. This was really good with the little trick-or-treaters and Elton John. So many good one liners ("You can't beat a bat flying out of my cootch!") I was dying!

Commercial
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"Telelink"(6/10)
PLAYERS: Jeff Richards, Seth Myers, Maya Rudolph & Rachel Dratch
*This wasn't too bad, short and sweet with a good ending.

Sketch
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"Quick Ones"(7/10)
PLAYERS: Amy Poehler, Will Forte, Seth Myers & Halle Berry
*This was good stuff, loved the talking quickly through an orgasm! Great last line too, "We're cumming!"

Sketch
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"Japanese Steakhouse"(7.5/10)
PLAYERS: Finesse Mitchel, Maya Rudolph, Chris Parnel, Amy Poehler, Fred Armisen, Keenan Thompson & Halle Berry
*Wow featured players galore! This is the second time Fred has done his Japanese character, it's awesome! He can do so much! The three ghetto girls were funny, and thsi was a good sketch, but it had a really bad ending.

Commercial
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"Sunday National Enquirer"(4/10)
PLAYERS: Amy Poehler, Chris Parnell & Halle Berry
*Third commercial tonight? Is this a record? Well this one wasn't as good as the other ones, but it had one or two chuckles.

Music
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"Britney Spears"(3/10)
*She is beautiful, great cleavage here! Never really a fan of her music, I'm more rock and roll you know? But this wasn't like awful, just not for me.

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey (9/10)
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PLAYERS: Tina Fey, Jimmy Fallon, Fred Armisen, Horatio Sanz, & George Wendt
* WU is usually a highlight of the show, and tonight is the same! Horatio was bad though... all night he was off. I've seen him live at Chicago's Second City when he was on the ETC stage and he is so much better than what he is doing. But other than him everything was great! Fred's Native American stand up comic is great! Does he have a new stand up comedian for Update every year? I must say I was hoping for Fericito though! He is great and they better bring back the AAAYYYY, los mios! But the Native American is awesome too, just no Fericito! =)~ Tina and Jimmy were on fire tonight and it was good to see George Wendt! I was hoping a REAL super fan would come get Horatio the hell out of there, sweet LORD! But yeah, in summary Tina Fey is BB! Brilliant and beautiful!!

Sketch
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"Best of Klymaxx"(6.5/10)
PLAYERS: Fred Armisen, Seth Myers, Rachel Dratch, Maya Rudolph, Finesee Mitchel, Keenan Thompson & Halle Berry
*First of all Mike Myers' Joey Laurence impression is better than Seth's, but Seth's was good! It was funny how excited Fred was for the best of the 80's CD, and all he got was Klymaxx. It dragged on too long though.

Sketch
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"Dan Rather Answering Machine"(5/10)
PLAYERS: Chris Parnell, Halle Berry
*Well the only two good parts was Chris's impression and when her finally gets mad. Bad premise and worse ending.

Music 2
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"Britney Spears"(2/10)
* She's a sweetheart aww! Anyway hey LOURNE!! Did you not once say that this show was part comedy and part rock and roll? Is Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake and John Mayer rock and roll? Or are you selling out to the teeny boppers? Please enough of the pop, book a REAL BAND!!!!! Keyword: BAND!!!!!!

Sketch
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"Ashford & Simpson"(6/10)
PLAYERS: Finesse Mitchel, Maya Rudoplh, Keenan Thompson & Halle Berry
*Mildly amusing, but it's been done methinks.

Sketch
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"Speed Reader Looks for Love"(8.5/10)
PLAYERS: Will Forte, Halle Berry
* The second week in a row with a solid ending. They need to let Will do more stuff like this he is so funny! I loved this whole sketch, every bit of it. The best part is how confident Will's character was that his reading ability would lead to getting the women.

Final Thoughts
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Main Players: Fred Armisen, Finesse Mitchel & Maya Rudolph
Favorite Sketches/Moments: Weekend Update, Tina & Lourne in the monologue, Versace Halloween and the great cold opening!
Worst Moments: That POS Don Zimmer Sports Show
All in All: Not nearly as good as the first two shows of the season! If you guys haven't noticed I am one of the nicest and highest grading reviewer on this site, and if I am giving it these ratings, I am afraid of the bashing SNL is going to get form everyone else. Don't get me wrong it was a good show, but not as good as this great cast and writing staff can do. Please take it up a notch guys! Thanks for reading and keep sending me your emails I love getting them and reply to all of them! Now in the words of Donatella Versace:
GET OUT!!!!!!!! =)