Halle Berry / Britney Spears
October 18, 2003

By Comma

Halle Berry is hosting the show tonight. Of course, if this sucks, or if people think it sucks, at least we get a little break from new SNL episodes and thus sleep in and enjoy a Sunday of no reviews. It's rough, especially during the football season.

I really don't have much to add right now. Hopefully if time permits, I'll have time to add to the review later in the week. However, this is it right now.

Apologies to all the Cubs and BoSox fans out there. Congrats to the Yankees and the Yankees fans out there.

Onto the Review:

 

KOBE:

Pretty O.K. stuff. This was probably the funniest thing all night. It wasn't a political opening, and it's basically on point.

97/100

 

MONOLOGUE

Thanks to the result of this, I'm not going to be lenient in grading this episode. However, I felt a vibe from the Beatles negotiation from back in the day.

60/100

 

COMMERCIAL

To add insult to injury from the monologue, they have this commercial. Whatever.

20/100

 

ZIMMER

Oh damn. I almost forgot that Halle was on the show before she came out. It's a shame when Halle, Darrell, and Jeff have to leave a sketch so that they don't cry live on TV. Also, yet another celebrity that Jeff is playing that Darrell used to portray.

21/100

 

VERSACE

This sucked.

8/100

 

TELELINK

The kid's WTF look was about the only thing that this sketch had.

83/100

 

SOME MEDICINE

I thought that this was good. Unfortunately, I wasn't turned on due to the fact that there was a lot of crap that preceded this.

77/100

 

FOOD

WTF. However, I can see Finesse getting the bump up to CM status faster than the OJ boy.

49/100

 

THE SUNDAY ENQUIRER

This skit reminded me of a Garfield book I read not too long ago. It was a pretty good one where Jon tried to pull a fast one on Garfield in order to get a pizza before Garfield ate it all. Turns out Jon made the one critical mistake that cost him everything. He said that he was going to get the mail. Unfortunately, the mail comes everyday but Sunday, and therefore Jon fails to enjoy the pizza. Like Garfield said in an earlier book, "Half the surprise and joy is better than none at all." In translation, while Roger Moore and Demi Moore are not related, neither Garfield nor Jon got to enjoy the pizza.

74/100

 

AND NOW HERE IS TONIGHT'S VERY SPECIAL MUSICAL GUEST

MMMM, Britney.

91/100 ­ Her "initialed" year of birth plus 10 for her looks on a scale of 1 to 10

 

SATURDAY NIGHT NEWS

I'm so glad that George showed up, thus preventing this from being a recurring new generation bit where George would surface later on. Fortunately, this saved the sketch from earning crappy points. Also, as much as several people hate Horatio, let's hope that he's not cursed and doesn't die between June 4, 2007 and June 3, 2008.

89/100 ­ Original Score plus 17

 

KLYMAXX

I love the 80s. However, so much for a Mike Myers cameo.

75/100

 

BROKAW WITHOUT NEWS ON FORD'S PREDETERMINED DEATH

I'm willing to guess that this had more of a Carvey/Ford spoof to it than the Rob Lowe bit in 2000. Anyway, this was alright.

96/100

 

MUSIC

MMMM, Britney, except MMMM, Britney. It would have helped if you showed up in more stuff. Better yet, you should have hosted and had Halle as the musical guest. A Britney/Halle kiss would have been "music to my ears" and would have sounded a lot better than this bit.

79/100

 

ASHFORD & SIMON

This should not have been this late in the night. Then again, it probably would not have made any difference.

 

10/100

 

SPEEDREADER

Will Forte is the man, so much so that there isn't a red line under his name whenever I type his name in here. Hopefully this is recurring, but even if it isn't, Will can and will come up with some other crazy characters. This is the stuff that SNL needs since Will Ferrell is no longer on the show.

99/100

 

 

Total: 1028
Average = 64.25

 

Boy, this is the first sucky show of the season. Well, these days, you're gonna get a crappy show. Maybe it's to prepare us for the 10-year anniversary of the worst inexcusable season next year when they present us with the worst crap ever.

Well, next week's Tracy Morgan, where is Best Of will feature the first time every skit he ever appeared in made the cut into his compilation of skits.

 

Well, that's it. I didn't even start to tally up the SNL PG, but fortunately, 4 people got the WU pick correct, which will definitely jack up the overall score as well as the individuals final score.

Thanks for reading. Later.