Nia Vardalos / Eve
November 9, 2002

By Stooge

(COLD OPENING) A Message from President Bush
Highlights:
- A big improvement over the Bush sketch from earlier this season. Parnell is getting more into the impression and he had a lot of funny lines.
- I liked the little bit with Bush giggling to himself as he shows the camera his ink-covered hand.
Lowlights:
- None.
Additional Notes:
- Parnell has been in all the cold openings this season so far.

(MONOLOGUE) Nia Vardalos: My Big Fat Greek Monologue
Highlights:
- Tina in a sketch!
- It was nice that Tina's mom came there as well.
- Rachel's appearance.
- This was short and didn't go on too long.
Lowlights:
- Will we EVER have a real monologue this season?
Additional Notes:
- It was pretty funny when Rachel's wig started falling off when she was dancing at the end.

(COMMERCIAL) Swiffer Sleepers
A repeat from the 10/12/02 episode. I didn't like this the first time. It's interesting to note that this was Amy's ONLY appearance of the night.

(SKETCH) Kip & Wayne Bloater at the sushi bar
Highlights:
- I like these characters, even though I know most people hate them. They're two of those characters that are so lame, I can't help but laugh.
Lowlights:
- None.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(SKETCH) Steven Douglas High School Campaign
Highlights:
- Darrell's classic one-liners as Dan Rather.
- Nia played a good nerd.
- The funny picture of Horatio.
- Fred's appearance as the guy in the fedora hat.
Lowlights:
- Nia's nerd voice got really grating after a while, though I know that was the point.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(NEXT WEEK) November 16, 2002 ­ Brittany Murphy
I'm not really looking forward to this. She'll probably do a forgettable job hosting, just like most teeny-bopper hosts.

(SKETCH) Sonia the Waxing Lady
Highlights:
- A sick but very funny sketch, and great performances from Nia and Rachel.
Lowlights:
- None.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(MUSICAL PERFORMANCE)
No comment.

(WEEKEND UPDATE) Fallon & Fey, Seth Meyers
Highlights:
- A good Update tonight, with a lot of good jokes.
- Jimmy's impressions of how other celebrities walk.
- Seth Meyers with yet another great Update segment. This was kind of reminiscent of Jim Breuer's Update bit where he re-enacted a fight he got into in a bar, but I liked this better.
Lowlights:
- Jimmy's Katherine Harris joke. It sounded like the usual bad joke he would have during the first half of his first season on Update. 
- They stole the Times Square/Crabs joke from Conan O'Brien, who used that same joke earlier in the week.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(SKETCH) The Ferey Muhtar Talk Show
Highlights:
- This is one of Horatio's few "over-the-top" characters that actually make me laugh.
- Nia's character was funny, as was Darrell's infatuation over her.
- After years on the show, Darrell Hammond finally gets a semi-big recurring character. His only characters from before were minor ones like one of the band members in the Antonio Banderas sketches, or the old guy in the Joe Blow sketches.
Lowlights:
- They shouldn't have made this recurring only because they'll never be able to top the moustache mishap from last time. This was still pretty funny, but of course not as good as the first one.
Additional Notes:
- Why didn't they do "Newspaper Mistakes" like the credits said?

(SKETCH) The Falconer
Highlights:
- The sight of the falcon sitting at a dinner table and eating like a human was worth a chuckle.
Lowlights:
- I thought this sketch had promise at first, especially since Forte was starring in it, but I was disappointed by the outcome. The only bad sketch of the night.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(COMMERCIAL) Pier 1 Imports
Highlights:
- A great parody of the real Pier 1 ads, and Nia looked a lot like Kirstie Alley.
- Like last week's John Hancock ad, it's nice to see the host in the pre-recorded commercial.
- Horatio's tumble into the shelf had me rolling.
Lowlights:
- None
Additional Notes:
- None.

(SKETCH) Dropping the L.B.'s with Missy E
Highlights:
- Tracy was very funny as Missy Elliot.
Lowlights:
- I see SNL didn't listen to us last week when we asked them not to ever show Jeff shirtless again. Well, he wasn't completely shirtless this time, but I still saw way too much than my stomach could handle.
Additional Notes:
- None.

(MUSICAL PERFORMANCE)
No comment.

(SKETCH) Glenda Goodwin, Attorney at Law
Highlights:
- A good parody of the usual cheap lawyer ads.
- The bit with Maya's voice dubbed over Rachel's during her testimonial.
Lowlights:
- Like with most late sketches, this could've been a little better.
Additional Notes:
- The second sketch in a row tonight dealing with showing testimonials from customers. Nia and Rachel looked like they were playing the same characters they did in that sketch. 

(SKETCH) Community Accents with Vasquez Gomez-Vasquez
Highlights:
- Another sketch tonight starring Horatio that made me laugh. I usually only find him funny in small or walk-on roles. He's having a good night. 
- Dean finally in a sketch again after what seems like forever. And he even has lines! It's a miracle!
- Good way to end the show.
Lowlights:
- None.
Additional Notes:
- This looks like it might end up being recurring and will probably take over the Brian Fellow's Safari Planet slot as "the talk show sketch with the idiot host." In fact, I heard they were supposed to do this sketch in The Rock episode from last season, but it got cut. 
- Nia looked a lot like Molly Shannon's Delicious Dish character.

________________________________________________________

(CONCLUSION)
A very good episode. I think I would rate this even higher than the John McCain episode. I couldn't think of any lowlights for a lot of sketches, so that's definitely good. The only lowlight of tonight's show as a whole was The Falconer sketch. I didn't know what to expect from Nia, but she really impressed me. I enjoyed most of her performances and she seems like she could be a castmember on the show. 

Funniest Single Moment of the Night:
Horatio Sanz being knocked into a shelf in the Pier 1 ad.

Best Lines:
- Chris Parnell as George W. Bush: "I like people. With the possible exception of Jeffords, the fudge-drawers from Vermont."
- Darrell Hammond as Dan Rather: "The results are in and the democrats are shut out harder than a Nancy Boy at a Texas cathouse"
- Darrell Hammond as Dan Rather: "That boy's cooler than Sister Mary Margaret's nipples on a cold winter's morning."
- Nia Vardalos as the Waxing Lady: "Honey, you got Robin Williams' forearms in your panties."
- Tina Fey: "An adverting company in London is using dogs to carry around ads. This makes London the only place in the world where you can see a McDonald's ad sniffing a Wendy's ad's balls."
- Rachel Dratch as woman: "Hello, police? I've been kidnapped by the girl from "Cheers" . No, the second one."

CAST MEMBER COUNT DOWN:
DRATCH: 6 sketches (Monologue; Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Sonia the Waxing Lady; Pier 1 Imports; Dropping the L.B.'s with Missy E; Glenda Goodwin, Attorney at Law)
FALLON: 3 sketches (Kip & Wayne Bloater; Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Weekend Update)
FEY: 2 sketches (Monologue; Weekend Update)
HAMMOND: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Ferey Muhtar Talk Show)
KATTAN: 4 sketches (Monologue; Ferey Muhtar Talk Show; The Falconer; Community Accents with Vasquez Gomez-Vasquez)
MORGAN: 1 sketch (Dropping the L.B.'s with Missy E)
PARNELL: 2 sketches (A Message from President Bush; Kip & Wayne Bloater)
POEHLER: 1 sketch (Swiffer Sleepers)
RUDOLPH: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Glenda Goodwin, Attorney at Law)
SANZ: 4 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Ferey Muhtar Talk Show; Pier 1 Imports; Community Accents with Vasquez Gomez-Vasquez)
ARMISEN: 4 sketches (Kip & Wayne Bloater; Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Ferey Muhtar Talk Show; The Falconer)
EDWARDS: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Community Accents with Vasquez Gomez-Vasquez)
FORTE: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; The Falconer)
MEYERS: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Weekend Update)
RICHARDS: 2 sketches (Steven Douglas High School Campaign; Dropping the L.B.'s with Missy E)

Another show with a Whole Lotta Dratch. I'm happy.

That is all for now. Thanks for reading.  ADIOS.