Queen Latifah / Ms. Dynamite
March 8, 2003

By Link

Hey people. After a somewhat disappointing and sub par Walken show, I'm looking forward to this week's show. My week was ok, school and working out to make JV softball. The tryouts are the 17th and I actually hope to make it. The coach we're gonna work with though (if I make it) is a real jackass but I'll make the most of it.

O's Report:
It's good that they're finally heading forwards after Bechler's death, but there are things that plague them, and me. First off, Scott Erickson is going to miss another year due to pulling a muscle in his bad shoulder, I believe. This means that there's 1 less person fighting for the starting rotation but it increases the chance that he won't be with the O's next year. I liked Erickson, but his surgery and rehabilitation has left me wondering over the years if he's going to make a strong comeback. He didn't last year so I'm doubtful of him. Also, the O's want to make a bid on Ken Griffey Jr. The Reds don't want to trade him but experts are saying that there's still a chance. I don't want him to be on the O's because that means that they'll most likely trade Sidney Ponson or Jorge Julio and those are 2 good pitchers. And the fact that Griffey hit 3 homers in 1 game a couple of days ago says something also.

Pre-Show Review:
Queen Latifah is funny. She was in Living Single, which I loved and now she's in Bringing Down The House. I haven't seen it yet but I hope to soon. She's also a good singer and I bet that she'll sing a couple of times throughout the show. As for Ms. Dynamite, I don't know what to expect. I'll stick around for her though.

COLD OPENING: 60 Minutes (Members Involved: Darrell, Chris P., Dan Akroyd) It was only time before we'd see this sketch. Nice to see Dan again but I'd rather see Norm as Dole although I don't know what kind of trouble that could've stirred up. And it's becoming a pattern now that Darrell is only in the CO's and nothing else. I hope that breaks soon. The whole thing is Clinton saying how when he was the president, the economy was booming and everyone was pretty happy. And I agree with that. But Dole replies with, "Bill, you ignorant slut." I knew that would get big laughs. Overall, a good opening and for once, none of the major characters say the opening line. Quite odd, but cool.
GRADE: B+

MONOLOGUE: (Members Involved: Latifah, Horatio, Seth, Fred, Will, Maya, Tracy)
Cool, a medieval/street thing. I liked how Seth said Missy Elliot was the enemy and speaks in tongues. And Tracy saying that the Cadillac Escalade is the "white car a black man can't own." This seemed like more of a sketch than anything but it was really funny.
GRADE: A

Sketch 1: BET: 106 Top Live 10 (Members Involved: Maya, Dean, Jeff, Latifah)
Ah damn, it's Baby K again. I honestly hate this character although I like Jeff. They have no realization that the kid is 18 months old and treat him like an adult. Very lame sketch with Maya unsuccessfully trying to sound black. I guess that's what her character was trying to do anyway.
GRADE: C

Sketch 2: Live With Regis and Kelly (Members Involved: Darrell, Amy, Latifah, Chris K.)
I didn't expect this sketch to be back so soon but it's nice to see Darrell again. Even though Kelly doesn't act that annoying, I really want to rip out Amy's throat right now. It does get on my nerves. As for Latifah, she did a good Frenchie. I even liked her calling Regis "Reggie". And Gelman is getting gayer. Can someone even do that?
GRADE: A

Commercial: Who Farted (Members Involved: Darrell, Latifah, Will, Maya, Horatio, Tracy, Seth, Rachel, Chris P.)
Finally, they're showing Fox how stupid their reality shows really are.
GRADE: B+

Sketch 3:
Where Are They Now? (Members Involved: Latifah, Amy, Maya)
Eh, it was ok. It reminded of the Lifetime Movies they do, somewhat amusing but quite boring. It's the same with this. I liked how Maya ended up in jail though and thought up of Happy Birthday and Thriller
GRADE: B-

Commercial: I'm a Celebrity-Who Farted? (Members Involved: Jimmy, Chris K., Darrell, Rachel, Jeff)
I thought this was better because Jeff didn't even hide that he farted and I liked Jimmy's Gilbert Gottfried impression. He never looks like the people he's impersonating but the voices are almost dead-on.
GRADE: A-

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey
(Members Involved: Jimmy, Tina, Horatio, Jeff, Chris P.)
-Horatio actually looks like Khalid a bit. I liked how he complained about how crummy his picture looked and ignored the important questions
- "I look like a Mario Brother had sex with a Brillo pad". Now that's a good quote
-Jeff was ok as Dustin Hoffman. I hated the sharp intake of breathing though
-Chris is good as a dorky Broadway singer
-The jokes were actually better than the guests this time, only after the Aretha joke though
GRADE: A-

Musical Guest: Ms. Dynamite
N/A

Sketch 4: Why Can't We Be Friends? (Members Involved: Latifah, Amy, Rachel, Maya, Chris K., Will, Chris P.)
Ok, they Amy and Latifah start to fight over a ham and their friends join in. Suddenly, Will comes in as a ham peacekeeper and starts to sing really loud and in a high tone. And then Parnell comes on and talks about indifferences in races and how we should all be friends. WTF? They bring 2 people together over a piece of ham? This is incredibly weird but funny in a sense.
GRADE: B

TV Funhouse: X-Presidents
This is definitely worse than the one with the Ambiguously Gay Duo. I did find it interesting though that they got voice actor for Spongebob to come on and do the voice. I didn't like the locking him up in a cage, although I don't like Spongebob Squarepants at all. I dunno, I just didn't like this cartoon at all.
GRADE: C

Sketch 5: A & E: Profiles in Jazz (Members Involved: Darrell, Latifah, Tracy, Maya, Fred, Dean)
lol, singing about getting laid in the 1920's is uncomfortable, but funny. Latifah did a great job as the dirty, but subtle singer and Fred was believable as the funky historian graduate with no job. I wanted to hear more of that song with Armstrong though.
GRADE: B+

Sketch 6: Your Personal Drug Store (Members Involved: Horatio, Fred, Latifah, Chris P., Will, Tracy, Rachel)
The discussions of disgusting diseases, rather loudly I might add. It was all funny, but the twist at the end was that it was a commercial for Walgreens. Who knew they would make a commercial like that?
GRADE: B-

Tribute to Mister Rogers (Members Involved: Horatio)
I was wondering why they didn't do a little tribute to him until this came on. It was nice, sweet song by Horatio but I was expecting more. Maybe a sketch or a full cast song. I think Fred Rogers deserves something like that, but Horatio was good anyway.
GRADE: A

OVERALL GRADE: B. I think it was a solid show, Latifah acting like a professional host with Dan as a special guest. And only 1 song by the musical guest. Perfect. If she has another opportunity to appear again, I hope she takes it.

Best of the Night: Definitely Latifah and Darrell. They made me roll all night. And Darrell is back where he should be, at the top.

Worst of the Night: Jimmy and Jeff. Aside from their celebrity impressions, they did hardly anything and they didn't make me laugh, a very important thing (so what, I have high standards).

Next Week: It's Selma Hayek and Slutty Aguilera. Fantastic. Well, I guess I'll know what to turn off when she comes on. I do like Selma though so I hope she'll bring in the laughs.

Well, this is Link and I'm off and out of here.