Al Gore / Phish
December 14, 2002

By Kate

Correction: Last week, in my "B-day Wrap-up" I said that almost all my friends were out fulfilling prior obligations, but I failed to mention that my friend Allie did show up. Allie read the review and was rather upset, so here ya go Allie, thanks for coming to my awesome par-tay!

It's been a busy week, I'm in a production of "The Velveteen Rabbit" (I play the skin horse) and we preformed 3 nights this week, so I haven't really had time to notice anything really hilarious for my "Funniest Thing That Happened This Week" segment, it'll be back after Christmas though.

Ok, I've been waiting for this review since I heard that Al Gore was hosting because I've written a mock telephone conversation between Al Gore and Lorne Michaels that explains how Al got the hosting gig. Just read the convo in your head (or out loud) using the voices of Lorne and Darrel doing the voice of Al Gore. (It works better than the actual Al Gore voice) Here we go:

(Phone rings, Lorne answers)

Lorne: Hello?

Al: Hi Lorne, this is Al Gore, former Vice President of the United States and future PresidI mean former Presidential candidate.

Lorne: Hi Al, what's up?

Al: Well Lorne, as you know, I've had a lot of time on my hands lately. You may have noticed that I even grew a beard

Lorne: Yes, I saw that, it's kind of creepy actually.

Al: Ya, I shaved it. Anyway, I've been watching SNL a lot since the election because I'm up late most nights working on my plans to over throw George W. Bush, and I was just thinkingwell, if it's not too much trouble

Lorne: What is it Al?

Al: I'd like to host the show sometime this season.

Lorne: Well, uh umcould you hold on a minute?

Al: Sure.

Lorne: (puts Al on hold, and in a worried tone, summons the writers into his office) You guys! I've got Al gore on the phone; he wants to host the show! What do I tell him???

Writers: NOOOOO! We can't make Al Gore funny!!! We got lucky with McCain! We can't take that kind of risk again! Tell him no!

Lorne: Damn, this is gonna be tricky. (Takes Al off hold) Hello, Al?

Al: Yes Lorne?

Lorne: Al, are you sure you'll be able to handle this kind of pressure? I mean, it is live TV. And millions of people tune in and expect it to be funny.

Al: Oh, yes Lorne, I know I can do it. I'd work very very hard! In fact, I've even been working on a few little ditties myself. I'd like to share them with you sometime, maybe they could even make it on to the show!

Lorne: UhhhhOk, Al, I guess I'll give you a shot, when do you want to do it?

Al: Oh, any week is fine with me, I'm free any time you can fit me in.

Lorne: Ok, how does December 14 sound?

Al: Sure thing Lorne! I won't let you down, I promise!

Tracy Morgan: (In the background) Get me a soda bitch!

Al: Is everything ok Lorne?

Lorne: Yes, everything's alright, but I've got to go. See you December 14.

Al: Ok, bye, and thanks again Lorne!

Lorne: (Hangs up and turns to writers) I'm so sorry guys, I just couldn't say no! I'll make it up to you, I promise!

Writers: (Disgusted) Ya, whatever Lorne! I'm calling in sick that week.

The End

Well, there you have it, my rendering of how Al Gore got to host this week's show. It may not be entirely accurate, but I'm guessing something along these lines happened.

CD of the Week: This is a new segment I'm starting. Every week I will feature a CD or band that I think is awesome. This week's CD is, funnily enough, is not a music CD at all: "Monty Python's Instant Record Collection." This is a collection of the best Monty Python sound clips/sketches/songs from The Flying Circus and some of their movies. It includes all of your favorite Monty Python clips like: The Dead Parrot, Wink wink, nudge nudge say no more say no more!, Bring out Your Dead, THE LUMBERJACK SONG! And many many more. If you're a fan of Monty Python, do yourself a favor and buy this CD, it will change your life! (no guarantees though)

And now, for something completely different

Pre-Show Thoughts: I've just read the sketch spoilers for tonight's show, and I'm sooooo excited!!! Hardball, Jarret's Room, and...wait for itDaily affirmation with Stuart Smalley!!! One of the greatest sketches ever!!! I think tonight will be the best show of the season despite the fact that Al Gore is hosting. I might even skip the cast party to get home in time to watch the whole show live.

Cold Opening-Old People Making Out: Al Gore is such a good sport. This was so hilarious, although at times it got hard to watch. Jimmy and Lorne were great, just standing there looking uncomfortable. But, WAS JIMMY SERIOUS??? Is he really leaving the show??? Hmm, that's troubling to me. But I'll not dwell on it. This was a great opening. Tracy Morgan coming in with the tazer gun was sooooo funny. I loved when Lorne said "We think you may be suffocating her Al." 9.5/10

Monologue: Al did a nice job of being loose; I thought he gave off a good vibe. The Bachelor parody was freaking awesome. Actually it was more of a parody of the political process I think, whatever it was, it was funny. Parnell did a great impression of Lieberman, and Seth Meyers looked a lot like Kerry (I've seen them make fun of him on the Daily Show) Anyway, the whole thing was just brilliant I thought. The hot tub scene was priceless. "metaphorical lockbox!" Good stuff. 9/10

Hardball: The opening comments were priceless. "The Bush team has fewer original members than Destiny's Child." Gore as Trent Lott was brilliant and very ballsy. Al actually did a decent impression too. Amy as the Democratic strategist was also awesome. I feel like reviewing Hardball gets kind of redundant. It's always top notch. I absolutely love how Darrel gets that excited look in his eyes when the crazy people come on, like Al Sharpton. Tracy did a nice job with it, the made up words were great. Some of the best quotes were- "Some if not all of my friends are white," "Senator, you're shedding a lot of light on the situation, unfortunately, it's coming from the cross you just set on fire," "Al Sharpton, one of Hardball's most dependable lunatics!" This was sooo great. The best political humor I've seen in a long time. 9.5/10

Fiesta Politica: I saw the set in the commercial bumper, and I started to freak out. I LOVE this sketch! Even though it's only been done once before (Gwyneth Paltro episode) I still think about it. I'm sooo happy they brought this back. It's so absurd and hilarious. Anyone who watches Telemundo on even a semi-regular basis can appreciate it. Maya is awesome in this, but there is no doubt that Horatio is the best thing in this sketch. Al Gore did a great job of keeping a strait face. Fred's character is a nice addition, reminds me sooo much of this one guy on Telemundo. And, let's not forget GARY!!! OOOOO GARY! Ha, I love it so much. Tracy Morgan is so funny in his little outfit, and I the dog's hair was awesome. The best part was probably when Al Gore was talking to Gary. This sketch reaches me on some kind of subconscious level, I just love it. 10/10

Al Visits the "West Wing": This was incredibly funny, and actually Al Gore was probably the funniest thing in this. "Get me Putin!" I loved when he gave John Spencer a line to say. Not much to say really, it's cool that they got the cast of the "West Wing" to do this. It worked, it was really funny. 9.5/10

Jarret's Room: YES! I knew they were gonna do this! Jarret and Goby had some good jokes at the beginning, I like the one about Santa, "Asian guy, goatee, had a beeper." Gore was good as the professor, the bit about Goby's term paper was great. And, Phish made an appearance! Al Gore, Phish, and Jarret's room. Is this the apocalypse? Ha, that guy does look like Chuck Norris. This was probably the best Jarret's room ever. I like Jonathan's new look. 9.5/10

Weekend Update: For the first time in a long while, WU was probably one of the weakest parts of the show. It's not necessarily because it was bad this week, just that everything else was so good. And, lately, WU has been in a slump. There were some pretty good jokes though. The running Strom Thurman joke was good. I liked the subway joke too. The Bunny Ranch girls were really funny. I liked how they thought Jimmy was a virgin, and also, Rachel's name was "Vidalis." You can tell that Tina wrote this, it was pretty good. It makes me sad though, that Jimmy doesn't throw the pencil anymore. I always thought that was a cute trademark. This week was kind of a miss on WU, but I have faith that it will recover. 8.5/10

Daily Affirmation With Stuart Smalley: This is one of my favorite sketches of all time. Al Franken is truly brilliant. His opening remarks were awesome, this character cracks me up. Al and Tipper were good. I had a feeling they would refer to the election. That picture was funny, again, Al Gore is a great sport. What else can I say, this is truly a great sketch, but I think that the one where Michael Jordan came on was funnier. Nevertheless, I was extremely happy to see this again. "Trace it, face it, and erase it!" "Shame spiral." Those are great terms. 9/10

Willy Wonka: At first, I thought that they were going to do the same thing as last season's Willy Wonka parody, but this one turned out to be MUCH better. It was so funny to think about the financial aspect of the chocolate factory. Jeff Richards really nailed the character, and Al Gore was really good. I loved the way he said "oompah loompah" it sounded as if he'd never seen the movie. Whoever wrote this has a truly great comic mind. I never would have thought of something like this. I feel bad for Chris Kattan though, he's been reduced to playing and oompah loompah. I'd say he's "oompha loompah doompity screwed," just like the chocolate factory. This was probably the best non-political sketch of the night. 9/10

Charlie Brown Christmas: Best Smigel cartoon ever!!!! When I saw this in the sketch spoilers, I got a little worried because I thought he was going to be making fun of the Charlie Brown Christmas special, but it turned out he was really using Peanuts as a tool to bring down everything that is so shitty about American culture. And, for years I've always thought about the arm waving thing, so I thought that was so funny. Well, I won't bore you with a comment about every little joke, they were all great, this cartoon really connected with me. 9.5/10

Let's Get Drunk on Christmas Eve: Ahh yes, another Morgan/Rudolph banter sketch. I actually really like these, but this one wasn't that great. The one from the Nia Vardalos episode was better. The song was kind of entertaining, but it got kind of boring. But, I did like how at the end, they ended up just ordering wine. 6.5/10

Christmas Song: My absolute favorite thing about the holiday episodes. I love this so so much. It's just quirky, weird, and funny. I also like how every time they do it, they change themes. This year, it was Christmas gifts. Jimmy as Harry Potter was great. And, just an interesting side note, I have that EXACT same keyboard. Kinda weird huh? I love it when Jimmy starts hitting the sound effect buttons. 9/10

This show scored: 108.5/120 or 90%

Post-Show Thoughts: This was by far, the best show of the season. There was a great energy, and the crowd was really into it. Al Gore really got into it too. SOOO much better than I expected it to be. Phish was awesome!! They're my favorite MG so far. I'm so happy this was a great episode. The only low points of the episode were when Jimmy said that he wouldn't be coming back (I'm still not sure if he's serious) and WU. It distresses me, because in the past WU has been the crown jewel of the show. Perhaps if Jimmy really does leave, Seth will take over. I wouldn't mind that. O well, I can't complain anymore, this episode was outstanding.

There's no "What I'd like to see next week," this week because I don't know who the next host will be. But, I'm really looking forward to the Christmas Special.

If you'd like to send me death threats, love letters, or if you've just got a question or comment, you can email me at <mailto:blinkgrl@wt.net>blinkgrl@wt.net

That's all for this week, until next time, this is Kate saying, "Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow!"