Sarah Michelle Gellar / Faith Hill
October 12, 2002

By Kayla

Okay, before I start this week's review of SNL, I've got to say something to the cast and crew of SNL, just in case any of them are computer geeks like me and have stumbled upon my rather cruel review of last week's show (Matt Damon/Bruce Springsteen & the E. Street Band). That something is: I'm sorry. The show was in no way as bad as I thought it was. I watched the tape several times over during the week, and it just really grew on me. So, sorry SNL for the bad review.

On with the review:
[Opening Sketch: A Message From the President & Vice President of the United States]

Premise: George W. Bush and Dick Cheney give a message to America.

My Thoughts: Oh, my God! Parnell is awesome as Bush! I can tell he's been practicing. And just like Will did, he'll only get better.

Grade: A+
Quote: "You guessed it; Botox."

Premise: Sarah Michelle Gellar gives us her monologue.

My Thoughts: I really liked this. It was cute. And it's about time the Vampire community stood up to Buffy. Right on, Dracula, right on!

Grade: B+
Quote: "I know, baby, I know. We all wanted t bite the Jimmy Fallon."
[Swiffer Sleepers]

Premise: Pajamas for children made of that Swiffer stuff.

My Thoughts: Okay, when I first saw this, I thought of the Norm MacDonald put a mop head on his wiener dog and sent him under the couch to get the dust bunnies. "Go get the dust bunnies, wiener dog!" Did anybody else think of that? And if Amy is blond. And the both the kids are blond. How was all that hair that of a brunette's? Either they've got a dog, Dad's a brunette, or Dad has been planting seeds in other Gardens ... if you know what I mean.

Grade: A+
Quote: "Who says sweeping floors can't be fun?"
[Not-so-Safety Class]

Premise: 3 obviously poorly trained "safety experts" try to teach kids safety.

My Thoughts: "And that's why the Indians deserved it"? They're gonna get calls on that one. I like Fred Armisen, he really commits to the work he does. I only wish I could see more of Will Forte.

Grade: a+
Quote: "If you must wear a condom, poke a whole in it so the bacteria can ventilate."
[Dentist's Office]

Premise: A dentist is getting lost in the love songs he plays to relax his patients.

My Thoughts: I loved this when they did it with Derek Jeter. I'm glad they brought this character back. And that second song they played, it's the same song that Conan O'Brien and Gary Shandling fell in love to. So, that brought back some nice memories.

Grade: A+
Quote: "What? No ... no, he's been a pain in ever since he got here."
[Trans American Airlines]

Premise: Trans American Airlines reveals their newest security system: Racial Profiling.

My Thoughts: Everybody was so serious and sincere. It was great!

Grade: A-
Quote: "By the way: You can bring your tweezers."
[Corona Beer]

Premise: A spoof of the Corona Beer commercials.

My Thoughts: I loved it! Why does Jimmy play such a good (and very funny) drunk?

Grade: A+
Quote: "Whatever, my boss is a douche!"
[At Home with Sadam]

Premise: A look at what Sadam Hussein might be going through right now.

My Thoughts: Horatio killed me. And all he did was walk into the room! The sketch was all right, but at times, the Iraqi accents seemed to border along the lines of a German accent.

Grade: B-
Quote: "That gay guy, Tony BLair, he wants to fight you, too."
[Corona Beer part 2]

Premise: Part 2 of the Corona Beer commercial spoofs.

My Thoughts: These are better than the Afflec commercials from last week!

Grade: A+
Quote: "I think that phone you got me is busted."
[Music: Faith Hill]

Premise: Faith Hill performs.

My Thoughts: Ah, she's all pop now. I like her country music better.

Grade: B-
Quote: None
[Weekend Update]

Premise: Fake news.

My Thoughts: I loved the Justin Guarini joke! And Seth is getting better and better at his impressions, but he did make the Dell dude look a little like Rich, the "making copies" guy. Tina's speech was all right. And the Ramada Sisters came out of nowhere.

Grade: A+
Quote: "Justin Guarini has signed a new record deal. For just 99 cents, he will receive 10 records."
[Making The Ho - ah, I mean Video: Dirrty]

Premise: A spoof of the new Christina Aguilera music video, "Dirrty."

My Thoughts: It's about time that little ho got what she deserved, which is a royal ass-kicking courtesy of Saturday Night Live. I'm sorry, but if Christina has such a great voice (which she dies), than why does she have to dress like that to get attention? his was a great sketch, but Kattan and Maya's dancing was a little scary. They were just to in to it, you know?

Grade: A+
Quote: "You know that feeling where you wake up with no pants on, face down on the floor of a city bus and you got like, a condom in your ear? That's the feeling we're trying to create. I love that feeling."
[Arliss DVD]

Premise: A treatment for loss bladder control.

My Thoughts: I never watch Arliss, so I can't really review this sketch too well.

Grade: B-
Quote: "Side effects may include Nausea, Depression, and slight Sexual Dysfunction."
[Sarah vs. Faith]

Premise: Tracy Morgan tries to start a wrestling match between Sarah Michelle Gellar and Faith Hill.

My Thoughts: I liked this sketch. For some reason, it's funny to see Lorne being called a "bitch" or a "bi-otch." I love Lorne. I think he's brilliant, but it's nice to see him make fun of himself like that.

Grade: A+
Quote: "You can't do nothing right! I set it up, you were supposed to close the deal! I don't know why I keep you around!"
[Music part 2: Faith Hill]

Premise: Faith Hill performs again.

My Thoughts: I told you she went pop.

Grade: D-
Quote: None

[A Woman and Her Breasts]

Premise: A woman describes her relationship with her man, while her man goes on and on about her breasts.

My Thoughts: Maya was so poetic, and Tracy just kept on talking about her chest. This kinda reminded me of Roger and Virginia Clarvin. You know, the luvahs.

Grade: A+
Quote: "Yeah, baby, but I creamed my jeans back when you said 'breasts'."
[Corona Beer part 3]

Premise: Part 3 of the Corona Beer commercial spoofs.

My Thoughts: After all those beers, how is that man still conscious?

Grade: A+
Quote: "Where are we going? Senor Frog's?
[Thanks, Sadam]

Premise: Americans blame their recent problems on Sadam Hussein.

My Thoughts: Did Will Forte's sound go out at the beginning of his part? I think that it did. It was an okay sketch, nothing real special.

Grade: C+
Quote: "Sadam, America is pissed off. Maybe not at you, but you'll do."
[Merv "The Perv" Watson]

Premise: A pervert comes by and ruins a sexual harassment seminar.

My Thoughts: You know, this is just the kind of thing Will Ferrell would have done if he was still here.

Grade: A+
Quote: "Anybody wanna blow of the seminar and head to Atlantic City? Shelly? Julie? Black Girl?"

This show was a really great one. I guess they just had to get warmed up to start having great shows. But whatever, they're great now.

Oh, and go to my web site!

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