Michelle Gellar / Faith Hill
October 12, 2002
I'm Joey MacQueen, and what
can I tell you...
Well, this is my first official review of the season, as last
week's was strung together in a matter of minutes, if you couldn't
First off, my summer column, on what happened over the summer.
THE SUMMER SECTION
It was warm... what can I tell you?
And that, folks, was my summer section.
After last week's less than amusing premiere, we finally have
a good host, unlike last year where it wasn't till November when
somebody worth while hosted. Tonight, Sarah Michelle Gellar hosts,
and no longer is she "That Girl from That Vampire Show".
Okay, I admit it, I called her that. But then I watched the show,
and I am hooked. She's a talented actress, and coincidentally,
I just rented Scooby Doo and plan on watching it later.
I've watched every episode of 24 last year, and bought it on
DVD, which brings me to my next section called...
I Don't Mean to Go Into a Rant Here, But...
What is the deal with the DVD? Okay, so we're lucky to have a
DVD, but why just the 24 episodes, a lousy intro to Season Two,
and an alternate ending? Where's the beef? No audio commentaries,
no interviews, no behind the scenes, no deleted or altered scenes,
no stars caught taking a leak, nothing! What's the deal here?
We shell out 60 dollars, you'd think they would at least give
us a commentary or two. And for the love of your god, let Kiefer
Sutherland host SNL this year, Lorne!
Okay, now a little analysis of the SNL cast members, judged
by their appearance last year, and last week.
Rachel Dratch- Last year, Rachel did her thing, but wasn't memorable.
This will hurt her in the long run, as you'll notice that such
cast members who weren't that special like Victoria Jackson,
Nora Dunn and Robin Duke, to name a few, aren't big celebrities.
Hell, they don't even appear on Celebrity Reality Shows. So Rachel,
if you want that spot on Celeb Fear Factor, work harder.
Jimmy Fallon- Jimmy has his following, but take that away, and
you have nothing. Jimmy isn't that good, and is a cheap rip-off
of Adam Sandler. Jimmy, you're funny, but try a little less.
Find some funny sketches, stick with them. Don't rely on pleasing
your female fanbase. Last week, he was okay.
Tina Fey- Tina's hilarious, but needs to work outside of WU.
Her few appearances were great, but her third year on the show
should be something special.Ana is gone, and needs a new dominant
Darrell Hammond- Darrell is the lead impressionist on SNL, what
else can I say? Political skits are his thing, so stick with
Chris Kattan- Chris has been on his last season for three seasons
now, so who knows when he'll go. Take my advice Chris, leave
Tracy Morgan- Tracy is pretty much on his own, with no major
sidekicks. Brian Fellows isn't special, but what do I know?
Chris Parnell- Back in March, Parnell pretty much fit back into
his same role: That Guy... what's his name? Hopefully he
will get some better material from Parnell, as he is a pretty
good cast member.
Amy Poehler- Last year, Will Ferrell was my favorite male of
the show. Amy was the best female. I'm betting this year that
she will not dissappoint, and judging by the first show, she's
ready for her breakout year.
Maya Rudolph- Well, Maya had a good year, but was upstaged by
Amy. Hopefully both will emerge as the leading ladies, and may
be joined by Tina, if she decides to work in skits.
Horatio Sanz- Horatio had some funny moments, and should have
a great year, which is also his fifth year. Good job, Horatio.
Dean Edwards- I thought we had another Jerry Minor on our hands,
but instead Dean is back. Hopefully more roles will come his
way, but it was smart to keep him a featured player, as there
is already too many cast members.
Seth Meyers- Slow starting out, then picked up, then dropped
off again. Hopefully Seth will get the push to full timer next
year, as he is also a valued addition to SNL.
Jeff Richards- Jeff was average last year, but seems to be doing
good, with the premiere episode. Hopefully he'll get more material,
in the wake of Will leaving.
NEWBIES: Fred Armisen and Will Forte debuted last week. Will
had one line, and seems a lot like Jim Breuer, which is a compliment,
since Jim is one of my favorite cast members. Fred already has
a recurring character (who thinks Ferecito will be back?). Both
have potential, so let's hope they get some good parts this week.
Well folks, that's my analysis of the cast members. Hope you
enjoyed, because I know I didn't.
SHOW OVERVIEW: Well, two hotties are on SNL tonight. And not
just Amy Poehler and Tina Fey. Tonight, Sarah Michelle Gellar
hosts SNL with musical guest Faith Hill. Sarah may have been
bashed over being in Scooby Doo, but the movie did bring in the
bucks, and that's what matters if she wants to be famous. However,
she also should do some roles where she actually shows off her
acting skills, rather than be surrounded by raspy voiced oddball,
a pretty boy dumbass, and a talking dog. I will not tell you
which is which.
(COLD OPENING) The New, But Not Really Improved Bush
Yes, we finally have a replacement for George Bush. Will
Ferrell will never be bested by anyone to fill those shoes, but
somebody had to. And no, it wasn't like when Darrell Hammond
replaced Phil Hartman as Clinton. This was the bad kind of replacement.
Well, not terrible. It was not entirely wasted on Parnell (who
has officially been given the push to be the replacement for
Will Ferrell, it seems). He is the same height, and yes, the
voice is good too (despite the fact that his voice is definitely
a cartoon-y voice). However, he doesn't have the facial expressions
down. Will made a point of it to make a joke of every little
facial thing the real Bush does. Parnell seemed to be doing an
impersonation of Ferrell's impersonation, thus resulting in a
mediocre debut. Was Parnell the best choice? Judging by the other
males on the show, I think so. Is it all easy from here? Nope.
Parnell has those minor problems to take care of, but Lorne and
Co. have put their confidence in Parnell, which also buys him
the rest of Bush's term in office (equaling two more years),
and if he does get re-elected, then Parnell probably will have
a year or two, then will leave it in the hands of, oh I don't
know, maybe Will Ferrell, after his movie career goes caput
(only a few SNLers have made it big, but I still hope he breaks
the curse). And, was Darrell pissed off, or what? Something was
bugging him. Anyway, overall, a funny opener. Overall: B-
(MONOLOGUE) So, I'm Going to sing a son... hey, look over
there! A vampire!
What in the hell was this? Did the writers actually write the
monologue as a singing thing, then say "What about vampires?
Let's do that!" Really, shouldn't they have continued the
first idea? It would have been a little funnier. This monologue
was every Simpsons episode from last year: you write one idea
for a while, then change to something entirely different
for a laugh. Well, few laughs were seen here (my guess is the
audience rejected Parnell's Bush, and oh dear god, I never thought
I'd say that). Plus, more evidence for Kattan being gay, with
his line about biting the Jimmy Fallon. What more could you want
in a monologue? How about comedy. Overall: C+
(COMMERCIAL) Dust Bunnies, Beware!
Yes, the first of almost an entire show of parody commercials.
This was actually quite funny, and Amy definitely captures all
the facial expressions of the obvious-robots in the Swiffer commercials.
The idea itself, however, is mediocre. Definitely could have
thought of something a little funnier! Either way, this
was good for a laugh or two. Overall: B
(SKETCH) The Not-So-Safety Day
Yes, it seems that this had the potential to be a recurring sketch,
if the audience wasn't dead (or still sick from Parnell's bush...
er, capitalize the b, there). Fred Armisen has already proven
that he will be a major asset to SNL (the same, unfortunately
cannot be said about Will Forte). Sarah was great here, working
with the minimally funny material she was given. Amy, as usual,
did a great job. She is obviously the leading female on the show,
replacing Ana Gasteyer. This is one of the three sketches that
uses several SNLers, with little to no lines. This particular
sketch was very similar to Dan Akroyd's, back in the late seventies,
when he had the Halloween costumes, that were obviously not safe.
The idea wasn't taken that far, but it was very amusing. Armisen
should get some more material in the weeks ahead, along with
a probable return of Ferecito, the latin comedian from last week's
show. Overall: B-
(SKETCH) A Trip to the dentist, gone wrong!
What was wrong with the writers? This was a seriously bad sketch.
Even Sarah's comedic talent couldn't save this horrible skit.
Will Ferrell had very significant roles in every sketch in his
past two years, and if Parnell is the replacement, his roles
should be greater (and funnier) than this. His potential is being
wasted, and Kattan definitely has to go this season. He's been
wasted beyond recognition the last two years, and I don't know
why he is still here. Then, after Parnell "dies" (probably
after seeing his Bush), it just drags on to two more unfunny
parts. The doctor thing was dumb, and the ender was odd... and
dumb. Plus, that Entertainment Weekly is over a year old, so
I guess it was left over from the dentist's office. Okay, this
whole show is forcing me to write unfunny jokes! Overall:
(COMMERCIAL) Nope, no funny business here!
A one joke commercial, mixed with unfunny lines. I have no clue
on why SNL is relying on mock-commercials this season. This was
not that funny, but wasn't as terrible as later ones in the show.
Will Forte gets his first of two lines tonight. Woo, for him!
(COMMERCIAL) Corona Mocks Itself!
What was this? Was this supposed to be funny? Is Jimmy supposed
to be the biggest dumbass drunk? Was this supposed to make fun
of the Corona commercials? All these questions can be answered
simply: Who the hell cares? I don't! An unfunny commercial, definitely
wasting time on the show. Overall: D+
(SKETCH) You go out there, and get shot!
Darrell's second and last skit of the night is average. Another
one-joke idea, added with a fat joke (with Horatio). Tonight
isn't SNL's night, but at least there were some minor laughs
here. Jeff is also being given a push upward, and could be a
cast member by next year. Overall: B-
(COMMERCIAL) Another One
Why, oh why, would they make two unfunny commercials in one night...
and they're the same premise! I have no idea why I'm wasting
valuable review time on them. Overall: D+
Well, I thought this would be a great Update. Instead, great
news jokes were brought down by the odd "guests". Seth
as the Dell guy was good... for the first three seconds. Then
it was just weird. Sarah and Maya were okay, but that didn't
provide any laughs. Tina's rant of the week seemed rushed,
and wasn't as funny as past rants. As for the other jokes, they
were good, but as I said, brought down by an average Update.
(SKETCH) Mmm.... Christina...
I never saw the video yet, but I've heard things. This was
also a little odd, and never really got funny at all. It was
really saved by what Sarah was wearing... mmm... hold all my
calls! Overall: C+
I hear it's an awful show, but to base an entire sketch around
that? I can't see why that should work. The parody itself was
funny, but you can't watch Arli$$ forever, now can you? I think
not! Overall: B
(SKETCH) Why Not Mud-Wrestling?
I heard about it, and here it is. This was really good for a
few laughs, and who didn't see that coming, with Lorne trying
to get them to wrestle, after scolding Tracy. Nice to see
the musical guest in a skit, which normally doesn't happen. This
was funny, overall, but was trapped in a very below average show.
(SKETCH) Hello there, children! I'm Issac Hayes.
Really, I don't have any idea what the point of this skit was.
At least Tracy had a few good lines. It definitely fit in with
the mediocrity (word?) of the show. Overall: B-
(COMMERCIAL) What the flaming f*ck?
For the love of your god, why did they make three of these god-awful
commercials. I'm being generous for this one for the one chuckle
I got. Overall: C
(COMMERCIAL/SKETCH) We'll get that evil bastard... and his
little moustache too!
I don't know what the joke was, or where it was hiding, but this
was entirely unfunny. Will gets his second line of the night.
Is it time for a three line night for Will? Me thinks it is!
(SKETCH) Here's Parnell's Bush again... no, that's just wrong.
Now, where was this hiding all night? This definitely was the
best sketch of the night! This definitely would've been a Will
Ferrell skit, so kudos to Parnell. Sarah finally had her best
sketch as well, but sadly, it came too late. Her acting skills
were terribly wasted. At least this was here. No, it doesn't
save the show, but it does prove that Parnell is the new Ferrell,
whether you like it or not. Plus, Sarah calling him Perv
the Merv at first was hilarious. Overall: B+
Strongest Players: Chris Parnell, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Amy
Weakest Links: Will Forte, Rachel Dratch
Best Sketches: Merv the Perv, Swiffer Sleepers
Worst Sketch: The Corona commercials
Hardest Workers (with commercials): Chris Parnell, Amy Poehler
Well, They Tried: Dean Edwards (1 sketch)
Post Show Thoughts: This was the most uneven SNL episode in recent
history. Parnell and Poehler led this show, while the rest were
given pre-chewed bones. Sarah is definitely talented, but on
here, here talent was wasted. Too bad, because I want to see
her back. I think the audience was dead, thus declaring this
Saturday Night Dead! Overall: C+
1. Matt Damon (B)
2. Sarah Michelle Gellar (C+)
Next week, John McCain hosts, which should provide some political
sketches, and maybe another chance for me to mock Parnell's Bush!
Until then, have a great week, suckers!