Michelle Gellar / Faith Hill
October 12, 2002
Hey, get this. It's a Friday
Night. I have SAT's tomorrow, and well I came in early cause
of the test tomorrow and I feel like writing so guess what, pre-show
Now like I promised last week,
this weeks review will have a full-in-depth analysis of the review,
but for once in this reviews history, its not going to just be
me talking. Alex is back for Week 2.
Alex: Hey everybody.
Greg: Okay, Alex, first off,
what'd u think of the show last week.
Alex: I thought it was sort of
hastily put together and lacked any strong skits.
Greg: Dude, I totally agree.
The actual thought of Tracy Morgan and Maya Rudolph in a leading
skit for a good 30% of the show really creeped me out on what
this show can actually become this season.
Alex: Also, get this, and I know
you pointed it out in the review a lot too, but there were 4
commercials, maybe that says something.
Greg: That totally says something.
The guy I feel bad for a lot this season is Jimmy Fallon. The
show is going to be relying a lot on him and his recurring characters
this season and with Update and all the other stuff he's got
on his back, I just hope it doesn't kill some of his performance
Alex: Speaking of the cast in
general, the cast is kind of weak; its holes are bigger than
Greg: I'm feeling a tagline here.
Alex and holes and 20-year-old underwear. I'm guessing this guy
really hits the college girls' dorm rooms on weekends.
Alex: Man, you're really good
at getting the fuck off topic.
Greg: Okay, we'll get back to
this whole convo thing in one sec., but let me first go over
the next few weeks and the shows upcoming for SNL.
October 12- Sarah Michelle Geller
and Faith Hill (tonight)
October 19- Senator John McCain and The White Stripes
Punk fans get set for the White
Stripes. Great band, I'm looking much more forward to it then
the Nelly and apparently some girl named Kelly Rowland performance
scheduled for the night. Oh yeah, if you're a regular viewer,
I'm just saying this right now. I've made predictions in the
past on shows and usually I'm pretty accurate on them all. Well
if you make the rounds on the reviews, I will guarantee that
about 75% of the reviews will give C's, D's' or F's to The White
Stripes. I like them, and I can stand their brand of punk music,
but the reviewers here on the site are not in favor of punk at
One more minor note here, Courtney
Love, you homicidal bitch, thank you for finally taking your
nitty, gritty hands off Nirvanas music and releasing it to the
public. Kurt should have shot your fucking face instead of his
Spazo Tom: I can hear the complaints
already for that line.
I know you shot him, your going
to hell bitch. I hope you and your band Holes' new c.d. sucks
balls. I don't think your band and term grunge can even be related
in the same sentence.
Spazo Tom: Oh yeah, lets hope
Sean never gets to this part of the review and just decides to
post it, cause I'm betting some of these lines will have to be
Hey, just thought of a brand
new segment. For the past 8 years, Courtney "Bitch"
Love has held back Nirvana music for everyone, so for the next
8 reviews I'll be making some sort of Negative Courtney comments,
like you just read about 9 lines about. Tune in for some real
Alex: Man you need a hobby or
something. Get into taking a shit on a picture of Courtney Love's
face if you have to. Just do something cuz were all-afraid right
now. Although I do have to agree with the whole Hole crap. Courtney
Love's just mooching off her husband's legacy. To me, she'll
always be the idiot who helped kill Kurt. I have to admit, he
was messed up before, but she sure as hell didn't help. So, to
Courtney, go to Burundi and play for the poor starving kids there,
and see what people in need really look like. Stop being so goddamn
October 12, 2002- Well SAT's
are over and now I'm just letting out some steam from the 5 hour
test. Listening to some ill Nirvana live music now. Good shit.
So it's now raining actually, pretty sucky weather. Actually,
it's not that bad of a day today to tell you the truth. I decided
to jam on the drums, play some Syphon Filter 3, and now I'm writing
the review. So turns out it's going pretty good. So get this,
the Senate passed George W. Bush's vote for the War thing. That
sucks. If we do go to war, everyone's life will be changing drastically,
its scary ya know, just wanted to let you, the viewer know that.
Yeah, I know your just reading it saying, what the fuck is he
talking about, but if we do start war with Iraq, the draft could
be taking your precious loved ones away, its sad. In my opinion,
we should just nuke them, but guess what, I'm the last person
on earth they should listen to. Even the goofy guy from Roseanne
should be listened to before me.
Alex: Actually, I was just checking
some info out, there was no goofy guy on Roseanne.
Greg: There you have it, even
some guy I made up should go before me in being listened to.
The good thing is, is that your never going to be seeing me out
there with a gun, cause to be in the war, you must be perfectly
healthy, rid free of allergies, and guess what, I've got allergies,
yahhh for me. Sorry to all those who don't have allergies, at
least you haven't had to have half of your high school career
behind tissues, it sucks.
Okay, no more war talk or Courtney
love talk for one day, back to the analysis of last weeks show
Greg: So, the rest of the show
last week was blah, and the opening could the term dull be repeated
going through my head anymore times.
Alex: Yeah, I totally agree.
Greg: And what was with Darrel
on the bomb. All I know is this, if SNL's 28th season starts
off with a Parnell/Hammond skit I know we're definitely in for
some trouble this year.
Alex: We're totally fucked if
Hammond is up there every week. I think SNL should mix it up
more, but knowing past years, they'll keep everything the same
till at least February.
Greg: Like I said last week,
Update, the music, and the one Jimmy Fallon skit was the best
of the night. I mean, I feel bad for Fallon this season. He's
going to be taking a lot of Wills heat from last season, and
Jimmy's got Update to do also. At least Fallons talent will be
shown off more, but lets hope they don't kill him, a la Adam
Sandler in '94-'95. You know the reason I make so many references
to '94-'95, is that that was the worst season of SNL to date
in the last decade and if they ever reach that type of season
again I don't think Lorne can make another cast up like he did
in the season after. Well I'm getting a little tired of talking
about last weeks premiere, lets start talking about the current
Pre-Show Thoughts: I think SNL
will totally make a 180 compared to last week. I feel somebody
will definitely show his or her talents off tonight. The hosting
tonight is by Sarah Michelle Geller who will be making her 3rd
appearance tonight. I hope they do the monologue where the cast
hits on her. The time she hosted in '98 brought a comeback to
Norm Macdonald and the time she hosted in '99 was just plain
hilarious with Will dressing up in a robe and died blonde hair.
The cut scene to Horatio eating the chocolates was great at the
end. Lets hope they do some of those classic scenes tonight.
The music is by Faith Hill, who I am pretty sure is a country
singer, so just be ready for the type of crappy rating I'm giving
that performance. Aright, so enough talk, onto the review.
Opening: George W. Bush Speaks
-No, don't call down your friends and tell them that Will Ferrell
is back on SNL, there's a new guy doing the President duties
this season, Wills suppressor is Chris Parnell.
-No shock here that Parnell won the job. I had a feeling it was
going to be either him or Darrel and since Darrel does every
character on the show, I thought it was a given that Parnell
got the role.
-As much as I hate to admit it, Parnell does a pretty good impression
of Bush. He's got the face and stuff, the close-tight lip thing
he has to work on to totally nail the impression though. If he
gets the goofy type character that Will had done, I think SNL's
set this season for the president.
-I'm going to give the skit a D, but in the following weeks,
I think the grade for these openings will go up.
-Oh yeah, what was the point of having Darrel as Cheney standing
right next to Parnell. Darrel looked dead just standing there.
He didn't change his face during the whole 4 minutes or so.
Monologue: Sarah Michelle Geller
-WTF is this. She whips out a guitar and then a Vampire starts
talking to her. Holy shit.
Greg: Nah, I can't do it, can't do the joke cause this will definitely
give me a bad name on the review.
-Kattan as the Vampire was pretty
funny and the fake laughter is probably what will get SNL past
this show. Plain shit right here folks.
Comm: Swiffer Sweepers
-If you ever watch any of the recent Brady Bunch stories on TV
and there's a close up of the character Marcia, just look at
Amy as the mom in the skit, tell me she does not look just like
her. Scary shit. Oh yeah, if you haven't noticed, I'm talking
about an old 70's show, so this commercial was pretty pointless,
but at least I'm able to fill in some lines, instead of just
giving the comm. the grade it deserves.
Skit: Be Safe Gang
-Pretty lame skit with Fred, Sarah, and Amy as cops talking to
a group of High Schooler's about Drugs and Stuff.
-The scenes to Kattan, Fallon, and Meyers were decent.
-The last scene was ok with Fred doing the talking.
-Really, what do I title this skit if you watched it. Do I call
it Kattan Recurring character, Masseuse in Dentist Office, well
actually I'd rather go with CRAP, but nah, I'll save it for later
in the show.
-The lip-synching was pretty funny. Kattan always knows how to
make dull scenes pretty funny.
-What was with the flashback to the Emergency Room and then to
the Food Store?
-Well, it was a good way to end a skit that went NOWHERE.
Comm: Trans-American Airlines
-Comm. #2 by the way.
Comm (I think): Miles Away from
-Nice title for a comm., but shitty premise.
-It was a mock of Corona commercial, are they that desperate
that they have to make a commercial and mock one in the process.
-Watching Fallon drunk was pretty funny though.
Skit: Saddam Hussein
-Hammond has such a look of Phil Hartman in this skit. Another
takeover of Wills character, at least this one was semi-what
-Kattan as the look-alike of Saddam was pretty funny.
-Horatio as look-alike #3 saved the skit. Horatios voice was
pretty funny and added to the impression positively.
-Good to know if Darrel leaves and they want to continue this
skit that they have Kattan, Horatio, or even Jeff to fall back
on. If you haven't noticed it already that I'm being SARCASTIC,
please read the past few lines.
Comm: Miles Away from Sober Part
-Same as Before
Interlude part 1: by me
-Well let's go over the Grades. 2 D's, 3 C's, and 3 B's. Forget
what I was saying in the pre-thoughts that SNL will make a total
180 tonight. I was totally wrong. However, there is still 45
minutes left and somebody could end up saving it. Oh yeah, why
is Parnell in almost every skit?? Will somebody out there please
answer that for me. There's like 15 cast members this season,
there much more entertaining to watch than Parnell of all people.
Back to the show.
Music: Faith Hill
-No clue on any of her songs, including this one.
Weekend Update: Fey n Fallon
-Better jokes than last week, I can tell you that from the start.
Highlights included: Jimmy Carter joke, Christina Aguilara video,
Michael Jackson/Seigfried and Roy, Krispy Kreamers.
-The Steven-Dell computer guy routine, played by Seth Meyers,
was really goofy and funny. I've actually never seen those commercials,
so I had no clue what was going on. The Doctor that Parnell played
was pretty funny, his point out there again, we'll never know.
-Tina's rant/commentary was really good, I liked how she just
got up and walked out of the scene.
-The Ramada Sisters bit with Sarah and Maya sucked. They were
totally drunk and that held back a lot of comedy. Shitty shit
Skit: Making the Video: Christina
-I liked Sarah's accent as Christina. She looked really hot in
the skit btw.
-Tracy was fucking funny as her manager guy, the bit with the
thong was really funny too. There going to use Tracy in a lot
of these type roles this season I think, cause over the course
of the night, his bits were the same and did really well with
the fan fare.
-Finally something worthy of being in the Best of the Night.
-Dean Edwards' impression of Redman totally died in the laughter
area, but he totally nailed the look of Redman.
-The randomness really showed how creative SNL is. Having a chicken,
steak, wrestlers, and this huge ass were great.
-Jimmy playing the role of the Director was great and he totally
nailed how they all look during the MTV shows.
Comm./Sketch: Some Blatter Control
-I have no clue the point of this, and why do you mock Arliss,
the shows decent.
Misc: Mud Wrestling Almost
-If SNL actually got the 2 of them to mud wrestle, that'd be
-Tracy is the best at these miscellaneous things.
-Faith Hill is pretty hot. Maybe she's single, I didn't see a
Spazo Tom: Well, dude actually
she is married and the guy is huge, he could totally kick your
Greg: So what, I'll just meet
her after the show somewhere, she sings country music, they're
not too popular, she probably doesn't have many fans.
Spazo Tom: Well, to tell you
the truth, she's got kids I think and I heard they can take you
Greg: Okay, that sucks, kids=Greg
run. Back to the review.
- Lorne trying to get them to
mud wrestle was great too, just cause its some 50-year-old guy
trying to get girls to mud wrestle.
Music: Faith Hill
-Same as her previous performance.
-Great Tracy lines, annoying Maya lines. I love how the only
way they do these type of sexy skits is with the same color race.
Why couldn't they have put Amy or Rachel in the skit.
Alex: Is the only reason you
want a different girl in there is to hope that they put Amy in
Greg: Well thank you Captain
Obvious. Who else have I been talking about for the past 2 years.
Jeus man, get with the year. What are you new here??
Alex: Wellyeah. Just finish the
Grade: B (decent)
Comm: Miles Away from Sober
-Funniest of the Set of Commercials tonight.
-#3 to be exact.
Comm./Skit: Untitled Part 2
-I'm really not sure if I already named a skit untitled, and
I'm too lazy to scroll up.
-Weird, funny though.
Skit: Sexual Harassment Seminar
with Merv the Perv
-Of all of Parnells characters tonight, this one was definitely
-Funny stuff, but offensive to Girls.
-Sarah was funny and so was Rachel, as Julie.
Closing Credits: Nothing that
out of the extraordinary. Did anyone see Dean's hair?? Crazy
stuff there. That sucks for Horatio and Tracy who got cut off
at the end while waving. That's the actual show.
After-Thoughts: Well, this is
as mediocre as it gets. It started off dead, then picked up.
The 12:30 and after part of the show was really good. Sarah Michelle
Geller looked like she didn't want to even be in the building
tonight. No acting at all on her part. And Faith Hill looked
really good and sang good, when I mean sang good, I mean I put
it on mute. The stand out cast members were Parnell cause he
was in every other skit, Tracy cause he just played himself and
proved he's still funny and Fallon just for being funny.
Actor/Actress of the Night: Sarah
Michelle Geller, Chris Parnell
Most skits: Parnell
Best Skit of the Night: Merv the Perv, Update, Christina Aguilara
Video, Saddam skit
Worst of the Night: Trans American, Be Safe Gang, Opening
Lines of the Night:
From Saddam Sketch:
"That gay guy Tony Blair want to fight you too." Fallon
as one of Saddams go-to guys to Darrel on who wants to fight
From Weekend Update:
"Justin Guarine, who placed 2nd in FOX's American Idol,
has signed a record deal, for 99 cents he will get 10 records."-Tina
"Here we see Michael Jackson,
Seigfried & Roy, and some animals. The question is, is the
orgy over or just starting?- Jimmy Fallon
From Making the Video:
"I wanna be like a hoe that hangs out at carnivals."-
Sarah Michelle Geller as Christina Aguilara
From the Misc. skit:
"Go get me a Pepsi, Bitch." Tracy to Lorne Michaels.
From the Crap skit:
"Yeah baby, I creamed my pants back when you said breasts."
Tracy to Maya.
"Saddam, Americans are pissed off, maybe not at you, but
you'll do." Maya as the Commentator.
Overall Grade: B- (show was much
better than last week)
Well, that's all from here for
one evening. Tune in next week for Senator John McCain and The
White Stripes. Should be a good show. Thanks Alex, and Spazo
Tom for making appearances. Good Night Folks.