100 bucks says no one reads this. I'm slacking big time this year. Sorry to all my loyal readers, I was a bum and didn't do a review last week. Now I realize that I got to get my act together so listen to my words, I will be in the first wave next week or all of u can come to Delaware and kick me in the ass. K since probably know one will read this since I'm in the 3rd wave of reviews I think we'll have a little fun. I will reward all of u people who are near suicide because of boredom.
I don't really know what to talk about before the intro. So with no further ado here's my review.
Jim's Preshow Thoughts- Well I taped this show, that sort of shows u how much I really love Derek Jeter. I really, really, really hate the damn Yankees. U don't know how happy I was to see Gonzalez get that hit in the bottom of the ninth. The main reason why I hate the Yankees is because I'm a Phillies fan, and the Phillies never win anything. One World Series in like 100 years only team worst than that is the Eagles. (All Eagles fans leave now because u all suck.) K that had nothing to do with SNL. Anyway since I'm just ranting I will mention the musical guests. What is up with 2 I don't want to see a guy named Bubba rap. I don't wanna see a guy Bubba period. Sakirra on the other hand, BOY would I just love to sit her down and..... Ask her about her singing ability. K. Thats the longest intro ever so I'll shut up and get to the good stuff.
John Aschroft and Bush- The intros have been week this year but what can u expect with all Thats going on today. I did like this intro though. The jokes that I liked from it were Getting stoned involves real stones. U're a terrorist if nudity is an excessive forehead. I will Give out an award today Will Ferrel's Bush impression is the best bad impression. The Ascroft impression was pretty good, better than his Rumsfeld. B
Derek Jeter-Monologue- This sketch was funny just because of how bad the people acted. The people always grabbed for the wrong places. The woman got hit in the knee as started to hold her stomach, and what the hell was up with the guy with the bat in his chest holding his head. Oh yea Jeter sucks. C
Preperation H- Look at my first review to see how much I loved this N/A
K basically since I'm in the third wave I don't want to waste all my good material so I'm just going to write like 2 sentences like everyone else does.
The Ingleses Brothers- Jeter didn't do too bad acting too bad the sketch sucked more than my review this week. The streak of first bad sketches is back. (Last week the Ambiguously Gay Pilgrim broke the streak.) F
Yankee Wives- David Wells in drag looks like one of my friends g/f's. I kid I kid... he's not my friend. Decent sketch nothing worth writing over 2 sentences though. B
Kattan sucks- I think that Kattan couldn't stand up straight after this sketch without embarrassing himself if u know what I mean. F
Dissing Your Dog- I find beating them and not feeding them for a week works better. A-
Derek Jeter's Taco Hole- I love it when the sketch sucks so bad that it could be mistaken for a real commercial. F
Dealing With Mom and Dad- At this point I was saying that this show was shooting for worst of the season. Wouldn't be surprised if this is a recurring sketch. D
Shakirra- I think I'll comment on that one. We had some lengthy discussions in my English class about this little performance. (Got to love all guy schools.) Anyone know what song she was "singing" N/A
Weekend Update- I'll just going to write straight from my notes. Al Roker thing was disturbing and Peewee masturbate was good. I enjoyed point counter point. Derek Jeter really does suck. He thought they were kidding LOL. Now that Giambi's a Yankee he'll be worth poop. The George Harrison thing reminded me of when SNL was funny. A
Osama- Its about time SNL had the balls to do an Osama and scum bag sketch. Will and Horatio were great as Osama and Rachman. B+
Perms- Derek Jeter really looked like the Rock had sex with a muppet in this sketch. Oh yea the sketch sucked too. F
Bubba- I forgot his last name. Not like I actually watched it. N/A
Christmas Song- They've overplayed this damn song. Still makes me laugh a bit though. And Tracy needs to have one minor sketch a night to get payed. B
My Big Thick Novel- Are these things comedy. This is the worst idea ever one SNL.
Jim's Final thought and Grade- This show is all right. Its better than what I thought. Jeter didn't do that bad but he still sucks.
Jim's Final Grade- C
Best Sketch- Shakirra
Worst Sketch- Anything with Kattan in it
Best Cast Member- Shakirra
Worst Cast Member- Kattan
Can U tell I like Shakirra. Probably the only time I'll ever mention a musical guest. K I'm sorry this review sucked but I doubt that anyone will read it. Its still probably better than most of the reviews on this site though. (pats self on the back.) Next week I'll be back to my regular lengthy form, but if your a frequent reader of mine and u like it this way E-mail me and I might just keep it this way. Next week Ralph Jackman. C'mon Pardo. So until next week this is Jim M signing off.
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