Tom Green / David Gray
November 18, 2000


[PRE-SHOW THOUGHTS]
Since the day Sean announced that Tom Green was hosting, I was hoping that it
would turn out to be another false rumor, but later on reality set in and
destroyed my hopes for never seeing this moron on SNL. I seriously will never
understand why so many people find this guy funny. I think were in for lots of
yelling and screaming from Green. I can see him right now acting like a
complete fool, I have a bad feeling about tonights show. In my honest opinion,
his "talent" isn't even suitable for where he started out, public access. I
just can't believe hes still around. Why not throw in Gallager, Bruce Vilanch,
Bobcat Goldthwait, Pauly Shore, Weird Al, Sinbad, Carrot Top, The Wayans
Brothers and all the other most annoying comedians in the world. As much as I
hate Tom Green, I will still watch, in hope that Green had no influence on any
of the writing, but then again, if Tom Green plugs any ideas, I don't even
know if writing is even necessary.

[OPENING] Battle for the White House
I'm guessing that alot of viewers are sick of these election parodies. Well,
for those of you who are getting sick of them, don't blame SNL, blame the
country, I mean Florida. I myself love them. I hope this whole mess never
ends. The "live" breaking news on tape was pretty funny. Like I said last
week, someone as talented as Chris Parnell should be in the show alot more
than he was this week. Anyway, Will Ferrell: Always hilarious as George W.
Bush, most of the memorable/funny lines in this sketch came from him. From the
minute the camera focused on Bush it was hilarious, Will just looked into the
camera for about 30 seconds with a polished expression on his face until he
finally said "Who me?" I love it when I get a kick out of small things like
that. Another funny part was when several Bazooka Joe cartoon gum wrappers
fell from his pocket, and then he accidentally read the wrong exceptance
speech. The great poet Leonard Skynard? I recognized two of the Supreme Court
Justices. One was Hugh Fink and another was one of Bush Sr.'s(Carvey) body
guards. It was alittle weird when Gore and Bush began to sing "I got you
babe." I guess the writers have done just about everything and are starting to
throw in anything that comes to mind. This was pretty funny, but I'm not too
sure how much longer they can keep going with these without putting them in a
different direction.
Funny lines: "A process rife with fraud and Democratic voo-doo mind reading."
.. "I'm sure, just like me, most of you have been very edgy and wetting the
bed. You've probably been tempted by the demon Budweiser." .. "Daddy help me,
I never thought I'd win this thing and I want out. Wait. Thats something
else." -- Will Ferrell as George W. Bush .. "Their not only justices their
also ninjas." -- Darrell Hammond as Al Gore
Grade: A-

[MONTAGE]
It's good to see they decided to get a new picture for Robert Smigel's
cartoons, they've been using the same one since 1997. Even though the other
one was better.

[MONOLOGUE] Tom Green
Oh boy, hes already acting like a moron. Personally I think the Green
possesses a metal deficiency. Why is Drew going to marry him anyway? I assume
she must still be doing drugs or something. Tom Green actually makes David
Arquette seem normal. I can see why his parents are embarrassed of him, and
what the hell was with him tongue kissing his father? This segment wasn't
exactly funny, and their argument was pretty fake. You should never end
something by saying "This has been a skit." This was still better than the
stuff that came later.
Grade: D+

[COMMERCIAL] Magic Mouth (RERUN)
They've already run out of commercial parodies? So does that mean they've only
taped 3 for this entire season so far?
Grade: N/A (Check my Dana Carvey review)

[SKETCH] Eagles: Starring Tom Green as the Human Tampon
Why did this sketch come on so early in the show? It wasn't even funny. The
only slightly funny thing in this was the fact that the Eagles went from the
Forrest straight to the audience and the birdwatchers thought that was
perfectly normal. Even that wasn't exactly funny. By the way, were the
audience members that were being spit on plants?
Funny lines: "Hes in the audience, Eagles do this sometimes." -- Jimmy Fallon
Grade: F+

[MISC]
Is it bad when a commercial is funnier than the actual show your watching?

[SKETCH] Rap Street
As soon as the announcer said, "with your favorite old school rappers.." I
knew it would be the same two guys from the Sugar Hill Gang that Minor and
Sanz played on Weekend Update back on the first show of the season. Horatio
and Jerry must have been good friends at Second City, they seem to do alot of
sketches together. I think this is the earliest a Jerry Minor sketch has ever
aired. By the way, why do these guys pluralize just about everything they say?
This sketch was actually pretty funny, up until Tom Green came in. Maya was
pretty good though. Midnight at the Oasis was a popular song back in the early
70s, my guess was that this was supposed to be a take on Eminem's song Stan
with Dido. It took me a minute to get that joke. At least Green wasn't as
annoying when he sang with Sanz and Minor, but he even had to ruin that by
dancing like a moron at the end. They probably could have wrote Morgan a small
part in this since he wasn't in the show, but what do I know? I think I can
predict that just about everytime SNL gets a rapper on the show, Horatio Sanz
and Jerry Minor will do a sketch with these guys. Anyway, this was pretty good
until Green showed up, but some of the sponsors towards the end were pretty
funny.
Funny lines: "When we rapped, we didn't rap about givin' your man friend
fell-ate-ios" -- Jerry Minor as Grandmaster Rap
Grade: C+ (Green brought this way down)

[SKETCH] Tom and Lorne in a Tub
Now this was BAD. I'm not talking modern day bad as we know it. I'm talking
about lowering your I.Q. bad. After this sketch it was apparent that nothing
Tom Green said tonight was scripted. How on earth could anyone find this
funny? Also, I think I realized why Green's "humor" doesn't fit on SNL. Tom
Green is extremely repetitive, all he does is repeat himself over and over
again(Eagles: Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Rap Street: I'm a good boy, I'm a good boy. Dog
Show: I'm a wizard. I'm a wizard. You get the idea..) Something like that just
doesn't seem to work in a 5 minute sketch.
Grade: F

[SKETCH] Hardball
This was the first continuously funny sketch since the cold opening with Bush
and Gore. Darrell sounded almost exactly like Chris Matthews, the voice was
slightly off though, I think he had alittle of his Phil Donahue in there. He
didn't really look much like him though. When he played Newt Gingrich afew
seasons ago, this is exactly how he looked. It looked like he was going to
pass out for a second, I guess talking for 2 minutes without breathing will do
that. Ana was also very funny in this. Wow, good makeup, she looked about 10
years older, quite an exaggeration on Katherine Harris I think. But it was
pretty funny. Anyway, this was funny, I was wondering if SNL was going to pass
up the chance to do a sketch involving Harris since they didn't in the cold
opening and I was guessing that Green would take over every sketch. This was a
refreshing sketch. Not only was it very funny, but it didn't involve Tom
Green!
Funny lines: "Tonight we examine a Mount Olympus of political chicanery,
Florida. Or as some call it, "God's abandoned construction site." The guy just
started building Florida and then said, "Ah! Screw it!" .. "Excuse me one
moment, I'm going to raise the volume of my voice!" .. "The Florida Supreme
Court has issued a gag order on you, in effects saying, Hey lady! Shut that
surgically alterd trap of yours." -- Darrell Hammond as Chris Matthews .. "Am
I going to enjoy seeing that Tennessee Robot cry when he hears the results?
Yes." -- Ana Gasteyer as Katherine Harris "When we return I'm going to yell
some more on the story were on. Your watching Hardball." -- Darrell Hammond as
Chris Matthews
Grade: B+

[SKETCH] Sex and the Country
I remember reading from Sean's site that this was the cartoon cut from the
season premier with Rob Lowe. I guess they thought since half the audience are
most likely Tom Green fans, this might be funnier to them. That has to be the
only logical explanation for this making it past dress rehearsal. As bad as
this was, it was still better than watching Tom Green act like a fool. When
you think of beastiality, this is sort of what you think of, without the Sex
in the City theme. So it really wasn't as bizarre and original as most of
Smigel's cartoons. The ending with the swing was sort of funny though.
Grade: D+

[SKETCH] Dog Show
Let me start by saying that I haven't ever enjoyed a Dog Show sketch. It never
should have been a recurring sketch. This one however, was the worst I've ever
seen. Probably the only sketch of the night not ruined by Tom Green. From the
second that pig began squealing, this sketch turning into a disaster. It was
very difficult to hear alot of dialogue, it probably wasn't funny anyway.
Grade: F

[WEEKEND UPDATE] with Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey
A little bit weak compared to the other 5 done this season, but still pretty
good for going 3 straight weeks without a break. It did have some good jokes.
I liked the Bush vocabulary list joke and 'yeah lets hang chad, who is he?'
Funny stuff. Jimmy seemed alittle off tonight though, nothing new. Molly
Shannon's bit was alright, cold enough to hang meat in here? The Barbara Bush
joke was also really funny and the best of the night had to be Tina'a joke
about Katherine Harris. Does anyones name that Jimmy mentions on Update
warrant a cameo? First we get Robert DeNiro, now Gwenyth Paltrow? It was sort
of funny when his "swoosh" effect wouldn't work, good cover. Alittle short
this week, but still pretty good.
Grade: B

[MUSICAL GUEST] David Gray
Pretty good. I've never heard of this guy before, but this song did sound a
little familiar. What was with that drummer though?

[SKETCH] Oprah
I remember someone suggesting that SNL do a Oprah sketch with Will playing Dr.
Phil, I saw this guy on Oprah (what was I thinking watching Oprah?) about a
month ago, and he really does look like someone who Will was born to play.
This sketch isn't the same without Tim Meadows, true his impression wasn't
very accurate, but he was funny when he played Oprah, usually. Will was pretty
good, but this sketch wasn't all that great. At least Green wasn't as bad this
time. But he doesn't seem comfortable when hes out of his crazy man schtick.
Dr. Phil's arcane messages and Oprah calling him a modern day Confucius was
really all that got laughs out of me.
Funny lines: "When you hungry for a corndog, a midget with a butcher knife
doesn't dance, does he?" -- Will Ferrell as Dr. Phil
Grade: C

[SKETCH] Storytellers: Air Supply
This was pretty funny. I don't think I've seen an Air Supply parody done
before. It's amazing how much the absence of Tom Green can make a sketch so
much funnier. I will never hear 'All out of Love' in the same light again.
This was alittle short, but still very funny. All of Will's VH1 Storytellers
sketches have been good.
Funny lines: "As we told you before when you didn't recognize us, we are Air
Supply." -- Will Ferrell as Graham Russell .. "I'll go ahead and mention our
massive number of hits again. Lost in Love, All out of Love, and The One that
you Love." -- Chris Kattan as Russell Hitchcock
Grade: B+

[SKETCH] Rock around the Clock
What the hell was this? I guess they were just trying to fill time. It was
sort of funny how Will was so out of sync with Tom but this whole thing really
wasn't too funny or entertaining. Good call to whoever cut to commercial
early. Still, this was not as mind-numbingly bad as the other Tom Green
sketches.
Grade: D+

[GOODNIGHTS] The Big Wedding
Who didn't see this coming? I think this is the first time they broke the
traditional Goodnights since John Travolta hosted in 1994. Wow, Tom Davis and
Robert Smigel wrote for this show? You'd never know it.

[OVERALL]
I think it was a big mistake having Green on the show, but I'm not Lorne
Michaels. Even Will Ferrell couldn't save this show. But hey, I guess its all
about taking chances here. I'm sorry if this review isn't very good, I had a
very difficult time reviewing some of these sketches, and on top of that I'm
sick. Lets just hope that the Val Kilmer show isn't as disappointing. I think
SNL could sure use 2 weeks off after this show.


Episode Review written by Emmanual Goldstein


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